To Thine Own Self Be True

Often I’ve thought about Gardner’s concept of intrapersonal intelligence as one of the intelligences he describes in his work on “multiple intelligences.” This I have understood to mean knowing yourself, being self-aware, knowing what you think about many topics and issues, and deeply considering why “you” believe and act as you do. My unprofessional analysis of people is that this intelligence is weak or limited for most people, and only a few people I’ve encountered demonstrate a great capacity to understand themselves. I somehow think this connects with people’s ability to “entertain” themselves and actually enjoy and even celebrate time alone. Anne Morrow Lindberg certainly addresses this topic in her book, A Gift from the Sea.

One of the topics that Stell investigates for his study of family business is obviously retirement. He often counsels people (mostly men) who retire and are immediately at loose ends as they attempt to adjust to life outside their former careers. Recently I’ve been reading and thoroughly enjoying the book Alexis de Tocqueville and Gustave de Beaumont in America, edited by Olivier Zunz. I am struck with how wise de Tocqueville was as such a young man (he was a mere 25 years old) when he wrote the letters and his journals while in America. On October 7, 1831, in one of his letters he wrote,

“There is nothing else that takes you so completely outside yourself, and as you know, the real purpose of this life is as much as possible to forget that you exist. To my mind, it’s slander to say that former ministers who dream of returning to office are dying of ambition. I think they are dying mainly of idleness. A minister becomes completely alienated from himself while he a minister. Afterward, he can no longer get used to living in his own company. He’s like a confirmed bachelor for whom one tries to find a wife . . . . “

Similarly on October 10, 1831, he wrote to his mother’s cousin in France:

“In any case, isn’t the principal point of this life to forget as much a possible that one exists? Well, I defy you to imagine a life (other than that of a government minister) that draws a man more completely out of himself than the one we are leading. Speaking of ministers, I imagine that the oft-heard allegation that they die from ambition after leaving office is in many cases pure slander: for example, our cousin Molè, whom they say turned quite green with envy after losing the ministry of justice. I am more charitable: I believe that what kills them after having been strangers to themselves for so long is that the can no longer get used to living in their own company.”